How These 5 Bad Habits Are F***ing Up Your Life
Want to get more productive? Download that new app.
Want to sleep better? Buy that trendy mattress.
Want to improve your health? Get a fitness tracker.
Can you see how we tend to solve these problems by using addition? It just feels natural because our complex lives need complex solutions, right? But what if I told you that more can be gained by using subtraction, instead.
In my experience, bad habits can crop up as a way to fill an emotional void, usually because of a lack of purpose and direction in life. When you don’t have a clear sense of meaning or ambitions, you can turn to detrimental behaviours as a way to cope with feelings of emptiness.
I used to play video games way too much.
About 3 or 4 years ago I literately spent an entire summer playing video games with my friends.
We would all log on at the same time. Put our headsets on and play Warzone until the early hours of the morning.
It was thrilling, fun and engaging and it provided a sense of camaraderie and accomplishment that I was struggling to find elsewhere.
And as the summer wore on, the darker side of all this seemed to emerge. At first, gaming was an escape from the mundane routine of daily life. It offered an immediate sense of purpose and achievement. And in the virtual world, challenges were clear, goals were attainable, and the feedback & rewards were instant.
This was basically the polar opposite of my actual life at the time. A lack of direction and purpose left me feeling adrift and unfulfilled. The more I immersed myself in gaming, the more I could temporarily forget about my real-life problems.
But as the days turned into weeks and then months, I could literately see the manifestations of my actions in my life.
The late nights and lounging around on the sofa led to weight gain and a constant feeling of fatigue. My social life outside of gaming suffered as well. I became a bit isolated from friends and family who were not part of my gaming world. Important relationships began to fray, as I prioritised virtual achievements over real-life connections.
Rather than investing in my future by developing skills or seeking out experiences, I favoured the immediate gratification that gaming offered. In my mind I could feel that opportunities in the real world were slipping away, but I still chose to game.
I couldn’t kick the habit.
Emotionally, I became more anxious because the temporary highs of winning in the game were followed by deep lows when I realised how much time I had wasted and how little I had achieved in the real world.
Some of you might have experienced this as well. Eventually, I reached a breaking point and I decided to take steps to regain control. I set clear goals and ambitions, focusing on activities that provided long-term fulfilment and growth.
And over time I pretty much stopped gaming because I didn’t want it to interfere with my responsibilities and goals. I rebuilt my physical health, reconnected with friends in real life, and pursued opportunities.
I did this by removing the habit of gaming.
And so today, we’re going through the 5 habits that are holding you back, and what to do to fix them.
1. Too much screen time.
No surprise there.
The technology we have in our pockets has revolutionised the way we connect with the world, breaking down barriers and enabling us to stay in touch with the people who matter most.
But this convenience comes at a cost.
We are literally glued to our devices. In the UK, the average screen time on mobile devices last year was almost 4 hours per day.
This can have knock on effects to our mental and physical health, relationships, and productivity.
Here’s what you can do.
First thing is to leave your phone outside your room. Whether you’re working in your study or about to go to sleep, creating a physical barrier makes it harder for you to pick it up and start doom scrolling.
Another tip is to use apps that track your screen time and set limits for certain apps, that way you can see where you’re wasting time and fix it.
Another thing you can do is to turn off your notifications. This one works well for me.
It’s much easier to reduce your phone usage when you’re not constantly bombarded by pings and buzzes. By silencing the noise, you can regain control over your attention and time.
You can also try blocking certain websites or creating rules like no social media apps until after 8 pm. Setting boundaries can reduce the temptation to check your phone mindlessly. Pick up a book, go for a walk, or spend time with a friend.
Filling your time with meaningful activities might decrease your reliance on screens.
2. Saying yes too much.
Constantly saying yes to every request or opportunity can leave you feeling exhausted. Overcommitting yourself leaves basically no time for rest which can lead to chronic stress and burnout.
Also if you find yourself agreeing to too many things, it can scatter your attention and energy across various tasks. And this dilutes your ability to concentrate on what actually matters, making it harder to achieve your goals.
On top of this, if you’re overloaded with commitments, you’ll be stretched thin, and the quality of your work will suffer.
The way you deal with this is by learning to say no. It is genuinely one of the most useful skills you can develop.
When you say no to unnecessary things, you free up time to rest and recharge. Saying no to daily distractions allows you to focus on what truly matters to you.
But how do we avoid these distractions and prioritise what’s important?
First, you have to recognise your limits. You can't do everything, and that's fine.
Prioritise your goals and commitments. Evaluate what matters to you and what aligns with your values.
Practice setting boundaries. Let people know when you’re not available.
Be assertive but polite. You don’t have to justify every no.
Schedule downtime for yourself. Make it a non-negotiable part of your routine.
Limit exposure to distractions. Stay disciplined with your time.
Stick to your schedule and try to avoid last-minute changes.
Reflect on your progress regularly and adjust your commitments based on what’s working and what’s not.
Journalling can help with this - I’ve spoken about it before.
By mastering the art of saying no, you create space for the things that truly enrich your life. You gain control over your time and energy and this can give you the key to a more balanced and fulfilling life.
Remember, less is more.
3. Multitasking.
Multitasking might seem like a skill that makes you more productive, but it usually has the opposite effect. It splits your attention so nothing gets done properly.
This happens at work a lot and it can be quite frustrating.
For instance, over the weekend I had just seen a patient who was really breathless and had a worsening cough. They were quite sick.
I examined them and told them that we need to do some scans and blood tests, and it’s likely that they would have to stay in hospital overnight because they needed some additional support to maintain their oxygen levels.
So I walk over to the computer, log in, and while that’s loading, I’m writing on the paper notes my examination findings and the management plan for the patient.
Then, as I’m writing, a nurse asked me what the plan was, so I stopped writing and told her.
And then another nurse asked me if I could prescribe some pain meds for another patient who was in a lot of pain.
Then my bleep went off, and I had to call that person back on a nearby phone.
At that point the computer loads up and I order a chest x-ray and blood tests.
Then I realise that the label printer attached to that PC doesn’t work, so I had to reprint the blood stickers on another computer. And then I remembered that I needed to check the blood results for another patient that I took a couple of hours ago.
As I’m doing that, the nurse in charge asks me if the discharge summary is being done for two patients that I planned to discharge home because the pharmacy deadline is 4pm.
I wouldn’t even call it multitasking, it’s just rapidly cycling between lots of different tasks.
And on top of this, there are still half a dozen more patients I need to see.
The cognitive load can be immense. It’s actually exhausting.
But there are certain things I do that can help with task flow.
For example, you need to write things down and keep track of your tasks; otherwise, things will fall through the cracks and you’ll forget them.
You also have to prioritise tasks based on urgency and importance.
You need to delegate certain tasks well. And by the, way these points can still apply even if you work alone or have an office job.
When you multitask, you force your brain to switch between executive functions. This constant switching can reduce your efficiency and accuracy.
Multitasking basically erodes your productivity. It’s an illusion.
So don’t try to do a million things at once. Reduce the number of tasks you handle simultaneously, and focus on one thing at a time. This will help you maintain higher quality work and preserve your mental energy.
4. Not getting enough exercise.
Adults should aim for 150 minutes of moderate intensity exercise or 75 minutes of vigorous intensity exercise per week.
There are so many benefits including better brain health, less stress, it lowers your risk of heart disease, diabetes and various cancers - the list goes on. I don’t need to lecture you on all the benefits.
But, more than a quarter of the world's adult population aren’t active enough.
So why is it so hard for the majority of people to stick to a habit of getting regular exercise?
I think there’s lots of reasons, here's a few below.
- Your exercise schedule isn’t compatible with your lifestyle.
- You don’t have much “time”.
- You set unrealistic expectations.
- Because it’s difficult.
- Because you’re lacking motivation.
I could go on but if you really think about it, there is only one overarching reason why people can’t stick to a regular exercise habit.
And it’s to do with your beliefs about exercise. Let me explain.
Lets use the “too busy” excuse as an example.
Lots of people claim they’re too busy to exercise, but if they spend time on social media, watch Netflix, or surf the web, they actually have the time. They’re just choosing to do other things instead.
The core issue is that people are choosing other activities over exercise because of their underlying beliefs. These beliefs drive their habits, even if they’re not always aware of them.
For example, some people might believe that:
- Exercise is hard & shopping online is easier and more fun.
- Resting and watching TV will make them happier than exercising.
These beliefs will shape their choices, and stops them from sticking to a regular exercise routine.
And by avoiding exercise, they’re prioritising short-term comfort over long term benefits.
The good news is that these beliefs aren’t fixed, they’re malleable and can be changed. You need to adopt new habits, back them up with action and then you can transform your bad habits into good ones.
I have certain beliefs about exercise:
- My health matters to me more than watching the latest series on netflix.
- I feel better about myself when I workout.
- I like the sense of accomplishment when I put the work in the gym.
You get the gist.
So grab a notepad and write your beliefs down. Apply yourself and put those beliefs into action. Prove yourself right over and over again and it will give yourself the confidence that you desire.
Remember, it’s not supposed to be easy.
5. Worrying to much.
You might be worrying about different things like your health, friendships, job security, finances, moving towns, finding a partner and so on..
These thoughts can make you feel overwhelmed and stressed - I’ve been there.
You can’t completely eliminate stress or anxiety from your life, but you can reduce the impact they have on your mental state.
Staying present and focusing on what you can do in the moment is really important.
When I feel worried or anxious about something, I ground myself and try to zoom out.
I remind myself that we are floating on a rock suspended in space surrounded by an endless nothing.
This perspective helps me realise that life is too short to worry about the past or the uncertainty of the future. It’s also too short to be overly concerned about the opinions of others or the fear of making mistakes.
Another thing that helps is learning to let go. When we’re anxious, we often cling to certain things or tasks that dominate our minds.
Instead, try doing your best in any situation and don’t stress out when things don’t go as planned. Accept that some things are beyond your control, and that’s perfectly fine.
Developing a habit of mindfulness can also be good.
Meditation or deep-breathing exercises can help you stay centred and reduce the impact of worry on your life. By focusing on the here and now, you can break the cycle of constant worrying and start living more in the present.
And surrounding yourself with supportive people can make a big difference too. If you’re worried about something just share it with your friend or family, a fresh perspective is sometimes all that you need.
Also just talking about what’s on your mind can be a good way to reduce anxiety.
Remember, worrying too much doesn’t change the outcome of events, but it can affect your quality of life.
Ok so to change a habit, whether you're trying to adopt a new one or break an old one, you usually need to let go of something that holds significant value to you.
This is basically why most people find habit change challenging.
It’s tough to release those behaviours and routines that we’ve grown attached to over time.
First, you need to ask yourself: Do you actually want to make the change?
Is it a genuine desire or is it just something that sounds cool? You need to understand your true motivation. Then you need to consider what you’re willing to do to make this change.
Quitting a bad habit is hard but doable. It requires real effort and commitment. You need to apply yourself fully and consistently.
What you can do is focus on changing your habits in small, manageable steps. Start with a small amount every day, then gradually increase your efforts over time.
This makes the process less overwhelming and more sustainable.
Accountability is another key factor. Be accountable for your actions.
Share your goals with someone you trust or keep a journal to track your progress. Knowing that someone else is aware of your journey can give you that extra motivation to stay on track.
Hopefully what I’ve talked about today has provided a clearer picture of the habits that are probably holding you back and over time, I’m hoping that you’ll remove the effect they have on your life, because hopefully, you’ll be making more conscious choices.
Remember, ask yourself; what will you gain, if you subtract from your life?
A quote from a great
Enjoy the day,
Z
Connect with me
https://www.youtube.com/@DoctorZobir
https://twitter.com/DoctorZobir/